Xenia: Warrior Bassist

My name is Xenia (rhymes with Kenya) Sandstrom-McGuire.  I am a Warrior.  I have a warrior spirit. A powerful Identity full of strength and self-confidence. It is a fire. It can provide the warmth and loving comfort of a nurturing hearth This fiery spirit can also rage with focused scorching heat toward those who would harm , my wife and our children. I strive for Justice, Compassion and Perseverance, thoughtfulness and empathy. I conquer irrational fears, prejudices and stigmas which weaken hearts so that all may find strength with their own inner spirit.

Xenia: Warrior Bassist
in her Music / Martial Arts / Yoga studio
I have lived in the Twin Cities since 1993.  I am a professional musician, a black belt in mixed martial arts, philosopher, an historian, an explorer, an avid outdoors enthusiast. I am a widowed parent of two young teenagers. I am also a trans woman. I always have been. I have always known.  Since my moving to the Twin Cities, I have only shared my transgender identity with a close circle of friends. Long before my wife and I began our romantic relationship in 1991, she knew and fell in love with my confident spirit - Xenia. Our kids always knew, though we never used the term transgender to describe me. To them I am just Dad.

Now, I am open to everyone. There is no stigma to being trans.  We each have unique experiences and stories as human beings. In continuing to be me, I hope to demonstrate my commitment to a life of Love and Inquiry, so that by my good spirit alone I can dispel the negative myths and propaganda that have dogged Trans identity.  I am Xenia: Warrior Bassist

I like to write. Well, I have an undergraduate double major in Philosophy and Classical Languages (Latin and Ancient Greek) as well as a Master of Arts in Musicology. Below are some posts of prose, philosophy, and poetry which directly relate to my trans identity. My experiences are my own.  I do not speak for any other trans identified person. These are my reflections, my experience. There may be something in my writings which might resonate with you -- whether you are trans or not. Thank you for your time.

Seek to Understand ~ Assume Postive Intent
-Krista L. Sandstrom

My Coming Out Trilogy:
 - this is a preface revealing my state of being and intent to transition to affirm my identity in 1991.

- This is my actual statement in which I reveal my true Self

- This relates my experience as a closeted transwoman feminist growing up in northeastern Iowa in the 1970s and 1980s.

 - about virtue, dignity, respect and Love shown when we honor others with their chosen name.

Child Rearing without Stigma: http://www.xenmcguire.com/2017/12/child-rearing-without-stigma.html
 - This relates my experience, my public and behind the scenes contributions as an active parent and closeted trans woman which put me in the thick of a huge and unnecessary CF and triggered in me PTSD - reliving my own peer abusive experience. Nevertheless, I worked hard trying to bring sanity, clear-headed, reasoned and open-hearted thinking, trying my best to model Classical Virtue, Socratic Inquiry, and Academic Excellence -- while not outing myself publicly. Had I done so, I would have risked an abrupt ending of those close friendships my children (then in 6th and 4th grade) had cultivated for over half of their lives. This overwhelming fear of having my children's friendships ripped away was because of the suddenly revealed outright hostility toward trans women demonstrated by the parents of my children's closest friends. T
Their actions and inability to both understand and model the methods and virtues of Classical Education, while verbally claiming they themselves were the authorities on Classical Education, did nothing to foster any Trust in their claims to Love. Their open anger was fueled by their unwillingness to learn and they resorted to making up and spreading lies about trans women. In this toxic environment, My coming out would be met with the same ostracism and violence that I had already endured by the exact same types of peers who inflicted much pain during my own K-12 small school experience. It sucked for everyone.
To be very clear here:  while I, me and mine and all trans women's true experience was being attacked, I tried very very hard to not let those attacks take the reigns of my emotional reactions -- I will not let attacks on me create hatred in my soul for others. You cannot hope to defeat propaganda with an equally blunt sledgehammer counter attack. As members of an engaged democratic republic, all desiring liberty, we HAVE to live with each other, not continue to wage war and division. So yes, I recognize my anger at those friends who suddenly exposed their ignorance of trans lives. and further spread misinformation - AND you WILL find my anger expressed sometimes inelegantly in my writings especially with regard to this experience. BUT I will never hate them, I would much rather build and strengthen friendships and love -- meeting their bias through living the truth of my own trans experience; continuing to demonstrate Love for all. We cannot hope to bring anyone to clarity if we constantly "hit them over the head" with a angry reactions.
As trans women we are isolated enough. Lets work to engage our communities through Love


My wife, my partner, my lover, the mother of our two children and best friend for 26 years was killed by a drunk driver on June 1st, 2017.  She was a Director of Organization Development and Learning at HCMC.  She was on her way to her voice lesson, then her Minnesota Chorale re-audition (she was a contracted singer).   I love my wife, I miss her every day. I wake up every morning crying because she is not next to me. Her absence leaves an incredible void in the WORLD.  More important than reading anything about me. I would prefer that you read about her.  You may start with the Victim Impact Statement I read on November 17, 2017 before the Judge, a packed courtroom, our children and Krista's killer.  It took me about 35 minutes, but I wanted to ensure I communicated enough about who my soul-mate Krista Lynn Sandstrom is.

From there please take some time to see her in action as a singer, a mother, a dancer, and HR Professional, as well as our October 2, 1993 outdoor wedding on this video channel:

Krista and Xenia

with much Love,
Ms. Xenia Sandstrom-McGuire, MA
pronouns: she/her/hers
Studio Artist, Electric Bass
Augsburg University
2211 Riverside Ave
Minneapolis, MN 55454
Office: Music Hall M-16

Some Warrior Stories.

The story of Atalanta in Marlo Thomas' Free to Be You and Me was one of the stories which completely resonated with my feelings as a child. Atalanta was who I aspired to be, and what sort of person I desired as my partner in life and love.  I was lucky to live that for 26 years. This is True Warrior Spirit and True Love

And I remember being about 12 when I last saw this story. A retelling of another one of the Greek Myths about Atalanta. This remained with me as a source of strength and inspiration. 

Around that same time I saw Gandhi in the movie theater as a 7th grade class field trip. The whole movie was a revelation and instilled my Warrior spirit with the true meaning of strength. This scene was particularly influential on my outlook. It has stayed with me for over 30 years. 
Rocky Balboa remains an inspiration.  This clip where Rocky gives his son some tough love, Is a lesson I take to heart and hope to instill in others.

This is a small reflection on how I bring my warrior spirit to my Art.
Bruce Lee, Liberal Arts, and the Tao of Jeet kun Do

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